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Sunday, March 15, 2009

Why Some Things Change....

Henry Miller, a man that not many remember, once said that "One's destination is never a place, but a new way of seeing things."

This could be why some people thrive on traveling to return home.  With travels, come a new way of seeing things, and understanding things.  So that when you return home, one can never truly understand where one was before.

Family that you always fight with in my case, become a link to our past, in a place that you may never be.  Friends either come along for the ride and put up with your incessant chatter about your next trip - which in essence is like your next fix.  Travelers crave their next get away with about the same zest as a junkie craves his next hit.  (Though it is a hard addiction to have.)

My greatest downfall, was my inability to keep my itchy feet to myself.  I told everyone and anyone that I wanted to leave, and that I wanted to get out.  This made even my best friends shy around me, and keep their distance, as they knew that I would soon leave.  

And while when we return from our travels, we can not see things for what they were, so the people that we leave behind find it hard to find the people that we were before we left.

But still the traveler will travel.  And those afraid will not.

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I have never felt my feet firmly planted on the ground.  When I was a child, I would dream of far away places filled with jumping kangaroos and gladiators.  I took my first trip when I was 19, running away from my issues and neglecting to deal with skeletons in my closet.  

Since then I have returned to my first home, and have found that while it has a special place in my heart, it is no longer home.

So I roam the planet, looking for a place for me to plant my feet, and find a home.  Will I find it in this life time?  I'll never know until I find it.  But I will continue looking for it, until my last breath.

These are my journeys.